So tired! managed to nap at work...and drooled all over my jacket hahaha!!
GC meeting was fruitful. Too much chinese though! Rehearsals was so so fun! I loved dancing with them hahaha!! Cant wait to get everything properly rehearsed! hmmm....Azizi fell asleep and teared while asleep haha! He even had one eye closed and one eye half opened hahaha!
Nadeen kept disturbing me pfft. Took my EZ link card from me!!! Had to beg him for it back! argh.
A and H and I sat down at macs and ate cinnamon melts! H told me something that made me really really really sad, and dissapointed with myself but they were just so so sweet lah and i just talked and talked. I feel so evil now. I dont let them both talk at all. They were so sweet they just listened to me. Didnt even say anything but just listened....lol.
I love you both so so much! Thank You so much for listening to me rant!!!! I always have things to rant about so sorry! I will TRY not to rant next time lol!!! :) Whatever you both told me today, all the pinching, trust me i will listen to you both :) Thank You! I Confess I Messed Up
12:23 AM
Kelly Clarkson is performing today!! (brings back memories of something i want to forget) HEHEHE...I cant believe i have friends who are going! hahaha! but i guess she is a good singer! HAHAHA cant wait to watch the vids when people start uploading...i guess its quite cool that kelly clarkson is in sg....hmmmm...who knows who else will come down to SG!! *dreams*
I am so happy today! I spent a half the day of talking about bands and new music with my colleague! HAHAHA! And laughing at all the weird band names! HAHAHA!! OMG its like so cool to be back! all the old bands i listen to still tour! omg how awesome is that! Alkaline Trio!! lol!!
Read SMBC and xkcd and visited oatmeal.com for a little more entertainment hehehe!!! LOVED every minute of it! Made me laugh so much! funny funny day!
YAY! another 10 mins till im out of the office! Gonna see my mom! She is probably gonna sit me down and make her problems into my problem...but its okay whatever makes her happy :) then my dad will pick me up! and drop me off at school! of which i predict erm lots might happen.
Not liking the weekend at all...was supposed to go out with jo and lav this friday but i stupidly forgot all about auditions! It will be fun! buuuuutttt.....i promised them. I really did....I cant believe i was so dumb as to forget something so impt.
However its confirmed!!! YAY parents will definitely be away for the weekend! Cant wait to spend the whole day glued to the TV set! and eating microwave popcorn! Technically i wont be alone...cuz my grandma is still around...but who cares! its still just me and the TV! WHOOTS!
cant wait to get to school....... :) I Confess I Messed Up
5:09 PM
OKAY i really need to sleep! the headache, vomitting and other stuff are so signs that says i need to sleep.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gyo9dA_05og&feature=related
love this vid....looks damn cool.
Okay....so yeah....2pm has a new vid!!!! wheee but bleh...yes HY! not so good lah...song was okay dance was okay....but i guess its the new style...so it was nice :)
again and again and i hate you will always be my fav!
jay...come back. I Confess I Messed Up
11:36 PM
I hate how pms makes me think differently....told people too many things that i cant take back....but hmmmmm.... Im sorry....Its just my feelings...im really sorry, i didnt mean to hurt you...but im hurt too.
Its the new week! Im going to try to start a new today! And nothing is going to stop me. I have finally settled everything that has been going on...settled everything that has been pissing me off so bad :) Wheeee! so Its time to start a fresh!
Meeting Jo and Lav on friday! Probably going to drink! Muahaha! Parents going away for the weekend! its going to be a good week :)
Time heals everything :)!
misery loves me... I Confess I Messed Up
9:56 AM
So yesterday was totally miserable again....I lost my earpiece I feel so so so down and incomplete!! Alrightsand my pms made me feel so emotional....I cried and laughed out loud while reading my story book at the hospital pharmacy and people just stared! But I couldn't control myself.
But I met an eight year old girl, after a sad horrible dinner, she was so cute! And she talked so much! So adorable! Made me feel good cuz for the whole day I kept talking non stop! I even moved my office computer around cuz I felt uncomfortable....hahahaha! I feel like I am not myself but somehow still so myself! Hmmmmmm.......oh right today!
I loved today! Loved it so much! Met azizi and went to school with him! Hilarious! Went out for lunch! We ate so much at fish and co! All of us felt like puking hahaha!! We celebrated azizi's birthday! Lol! He was so expecting it hahaha! But it was still so hilarious! Got it all on video! Lol but I didn't record the cute Malay gay waiter!!! So disappointed! Pfft. Lol!!! Hmmmmmmmoh yeah the songs at fish and co was all love or breakup songs! Lol! All four of us Just kept emoing Non stop!!! We even wanted to leave!!! It got really bad all of us left being all emo!
Went to the comic collectable shop! Angel wanted to buy an iron man live size figure for 1300 I think? The salesperson kept saying that it was fragile and you will need a big place to display it....blah blah! Hehehehehe! After all four of us going gaaah gaaah at all the figurines angel saw a man utd poster with glory glory man utd writen on it! And started singing! Hahahaha! Hilarious! Then she realised she was the only man utd fan! Lol!
The three of us went for date night while angel had to go.... Hahahaha the cinema cashier person hahaha her name was ruby lol! She was so so so irritated with us for taking like 15 mins to choose a movie to watch hahaha! She kept talking to the partner next to her in Tagalog with this super pissed face! Lol lol!!!!
We got milk for the movie each of us different flavours hehehe I got my wonderful banana milk! Of which half spilled in my bag! Lol!!!! Ohoh yes! Date night was hilarious! It was so so good!!! Esp when I watched it with hazwan and azizi! They made everything funnier! Lol!!!
Train ride home was just as fun! We followed wan all the way to chua chu kang! Lol but on the way we called up juniors! And azizi called Kaye lol! Then we put her on speaker on the train! And the whole train could hear her hahahahaha!!!!!! They kept staring at me and azizi! Haha! Then azizi called her a bitch cuz she said " eh I ttyl I'm watching soccer" hahahaha!!! Funny shit!
Took the train back with azizi! Called more people....talked a lot.....a lot a lot! Shared a lot of anger....said a lot of vulgarities on the train....he walked me home....We stood downstairs and just talked for an hour! Shared a lot of tears.....Shared a lot of our feelings talked about everything....tears streaming down both our faces.
I actually really wanted breakdown but each time when I talked to someone they would talk about their problems but I never got to share mine....so when azizi asked " what happened" i guess I just felt like I had to let it all out. I told him everything.....and he just listened and understood perfectly! He was there for me. And made me feel so nice......he was like an older brother to me! I hugged him so many times!
Whatever he told me it made so much sense....I realised so so much, both of us do...but both of us know that it's just something impossible to do. And so the both of will just keep doing what we do best. ......
Came home got insulted....scolded.....nagged.....by everyone in the house! Just as I wanted to run to my room to cry I open my door and I realise my grandmother is sleeping there with her maid.... I'm in the dark now just got scolded again....3 times about the same thing! I mean the whole bottle of milk spilled in my bag everything is wet! What do you expect me to do! Stuff it in my bag! Argh!!! I am glad I am updating about my day he switched off all the lights because my dad refuses to acknowledge my presence so he just switched everything off. I like it though the dark and the silence :) just what I need. ....
wells! I need to go back to my snoring grandma and just sleep.......just try lah!"
good nights everyone and everththing See you!
T I Confess I Messed Up
12:02 AM
Wah my pms is killing me im in such horrible pain....even fizzy kept asking me if i was alright....i had to like curl up in a ball for a while before i could get up again. Its probably the worst ever! I havent felt this miserable in so long! pretending and forcing myself to be fine and hyper doesnt help at all! I feel like im going to crash soon! Used up too much of my energy! ARGH! but...yeah! okok....just going to go hug a pillow to make the pain feel less.............PAIN!!!!!
Time to crash......... I Confess I Messed Up
9:28 PM
.......................talking to you nat.............makes me just want to say thank you. Yes you talked so much about Angeline I barely managed to tell you anything about myself but in the end....thank you. I didn't know who to turn to. I felt so dumb. Plus today wasn't the best day of my life.....things were so horible for me today......Thank you for your advice. I really appreaciate that you talked to me even though you had to wake up at 6.30 just to make sure that I end up sleeping with a retarded smile on my face, abs hurting like mad and thinking about teen titans! Hahaha! I love you woman. Even if Angeline breaks your brittle heart again. Know that this time I will be There for you. Always. Good nights. I Confess I Messed Up
12:51 AM
maybe i am bored i just couldnt help it....it was too tempting...helen dont kill me.
this is my "creation". I did not intend to break any copyright. All images are from onemangga.com!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I love myself and I love paint! lolness. I Confess I Messed Up
10:08 AM
ah!!! still have to do my bloody flyer which i cant seem to open!!! pfft!!! IM SCREWED!!! I Confess I Messed Up
11:53 PM
I need to do my german club flyers!! ARGH!!!
....last night was really shocking.
Firstly, the wedding was awesome. Everyone was dressed up so so well! i felt underdressed! My godma said i looked good though! so happy! The food was great! and company was fun! Music was a bit too loud but they sang dhoom and kal ho na ho and i did a bit of dancing in my seat with my aunt which was really fun! haha! sadly no dance floor last night or it would have been better! The emcee should have been booed of stage!!! ARGH and the people who did the congratulatory speeches had such badly written speeches, they pronounced thanks as thankshh.
Hehe. My aunt was so so high! haha! Talking nonsence OMG! I bet she wont remember inviting me to a bollywood club when she wakes up today! HAHAHA! The chinese waiters were a bit irritating because of the language barrier....this is a malay indian wedding for goodness sakes...get people who at least know what the word "YES" means.
I didnt drink much but having only 2hrs sleep the night or day before didnt help me at all. I was so high...i couldnt feel my legs or more of my heels! Ended up tripping all the way home! My dad kept saying...no way...you only had what 3 beers...I think i had 4 though but still only 4 and i already felt like hugging everyone i met. HAHAHA! It felt real good though, helped me sleep.
O.o Plus there was this really HOT chinese guy mohawk, tatoos, tall and cute features! with an ang moh lady making out on the dancefloor HAHAHAHA!!! SO COOL!!!! SO HOT please!!!
However...as usual weddings are a time when you catch up with old friends and relatives. Time when you catch up with the happenings of the family.
I saw my ex classmate's dad with another woman. Cuddling and kissing. I couldnt believe it! I used to go to her parties and see her parents... so close, so loving. Her mom is such a awesome person. I guess when you are in showbiz woman flock to you and things happen but... :(
Whats worse, when i mom asked my aunt about it. My aunt spoke of the separation like it was nothing. My mom got extremely angry. She felt it was very necessary to make it very clear that "the wife" was her good friend. Apparently it got awkward after that...DUH.
My distant cousin divorced his wife of 9 years and remarried. The girl or should i say woman....??? Hmmmmm....ANYWAYS she is SUPER gorgeous! LIKE NORTH INDIAN! LIKE nice dark black hair!!! with super cool eyes!!! and good complexion and just looking all VA VA VOOM oh and most definitely pregnant...but still...
My other aunt, i think she married a married man. The whole family was hush hush about his presence when we went around wishing everyone.
I met my filthy rich aunt after what seemed like ages! Her husband is still stuck up.
Oh and i found out i have an aunt who might be practicing black magic!! which really really freaks me out since she was sitting 2 seats away from me! SO FREAKY.
I was expecting a culture shock since it was a mixed marriage and all...but didnt expect this.HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Hmmmmm...so yesterday was eventful. Today hopefully would be a good day at work, hopefully qoute helens daily morning nags "dont fall asleep on your desk!" yeah hopefully i dont. hehe.
Erm i pray my juniors aren't as bad as i hear they are. I hope also that i get my leave on thursday! :D AWESOMENESS! Then i can see HT!! And there wont be anymore flying fox! So GC booth should be pushed back to sports hall! Awesome! It will make my life so much easier!
bleh. I Confess I Messed Up
9:20 AM
....I need a new space.
Free Big Bang Theory, two and a half man, criminal minds and ten things i hate about you....MORE...Yes awesomeness. no sleep for the whole week!
BBQ was the worse time I had in my life. I never felt so insecure before. Never. It was like I couldn't trust anyone. And I don't even know why? I think I might have made a huge mistake by trying too hard to fit in and I might have gotten Really annoying.... Pfft. So angry with myself. Funny thing was gabby was having the exact same feelings about her outing too. We both felt so depressed...i was telling her that i wanted to cry...and so did she. But after a few exchanges about our horrible depressing Saturday, which we both really looked forward to, we decided to make the most out of what's left of the day. And we did! She slept late while smsing me about how she can't wait for man u to beat Chelsea lol! Thats the only thing apparently that would make her really really really happy! Hahaha! funny sh*t. And I took a ride to the jetty with my fav gay couple talking dirty and of course gossiping and ranting hahaha!!
They told me all their lovey dovey stories hehe. All their firsts....HMMMMMM....the cute stuff that they both do... Like feeling bad cuz one of them had to leave early while the other was feeling bad cuz he could not follow the other home... So cute right...? AWWWWWWW. Oh and not forgetting the first time they brought each other home haha!!
Just when I said goodnights to gabby after all the funny msgs! We really have our stupid moments sometimes...How I wished she was with me! We would have rode and just talked all night long haha! Oh and I was actually thinking wow I really can have fun today. BUT.
ANYWAYS I get thrown into another mess. Coincidently the thing i didnt want to happen, happened.
Oh I cracked my toe I think. The wound is still bleeding and my big toe is super sore! Bleh.... But I had loads of fun I did...singing, talking about relationships with ilham lol!!! And being on my own. Drawing, writting, reading :D. Yeah I managed to do all that! Haha! I was alone, well sheila was in front of me sleeping but yeah other than that i was alone :) Anyways enough about yesterday.
I finally took the advice of someone to talk to my mom. I didn't get a nagging, no long conversation which is extremely surprising since just now in the morning on the way back from church she kept nagging about how I should never trust or be too close to school friends because they would just break my heart and cause me pain. That school friends would always be superficial. Church friends apparently would never gossip, hurt or abandon me. Hmmmmm. I don't have any church friends. Do i have to look for new friends now? hahaha!
Anyways.... She just asked me a surprising question which I replied "yes" to out of curiousity and learnt so much about my mom. She was so cool! Hahaha! But after all the surprises....she ended the convo with something that made me feel fuzzy and warm and happy.
I know now. My mom never stopped me because she wanted me to learn the hard way, the way she did when she dated her girlfriend for 10 years and ended up marrying my idiotic dad. She kept a picture of them both(so cute)she even scanned it so she would always have a back up in the computer. What made me all happy was that when she showed me the photo my mom just kept smilling.
Maybe for some this is too much information to reveal on a blog. But its my blog. And right now I'm feeling really happy. My mom actually revealed something she probably swore never to tell me so that I could finally come to my senses.
i figured she just wanted to tell me that things dont work out the way you want it too. So what? Who cares? Life goes on. YOU ARE A CATHOLIC. LOL!
HAHAHA gabs and i were laughing about the situations i get myself into all the time yesterday! Gabs was like "hmmmm...i think i can see why you find the whole situation hilarious now" lol. It was fun laughing at myself....its a good thing :) phew... hehe.
I cant lie and say i am over you. When i think about things i get angry, upset, i feel stupid. But then again im fine, or at least i know one day i will fully be fine. I just need time. I know i can get over you :)If you are worrying about me trying to get you back or not getting over you. You dont worry alrights. I am not that stupid....haha! I know it will never happen so there is no point. If you feel its better this way then ai yah i will just deal with it lah. So yeah....hahaha! omg i ended laughing again.
Okay well I'm just gonna take 40 winks before I get ready for my culture shock at pan pacific! Haha! Going to meet my aunts relatives....can't wait!! YIPEES
OHHHH! And i wont be saying vulgarities from today onwards. YES! I can do it! hahaha!!! I Confess I Messed Up
3:50 PM
I tried. I failed. I ended up lying to myself again. Congrats and thank you. I Confess I Messed Up
1:00 AM
MY LIFE! haha! I Confess I Messed Up
11:38 PM
HAHAHAHA!!!! was online...laughing to myself at work! hahaha! HY probably tot i was being possesed! haha! omg!!! Today was the so hilarious! talking to Hazel bout chinese class and caroline! omg!!! and china people!! HAHAHA! talked about how we love kurt! hehe! everytime HT said SJ! i started laughing! Couldnt stop laughing myself!!! kept having to hide my face in my jacket so that i can laugh! hehehe.
so i get to school meet nadh, meet victor, meet someone who went for my horribly planned SA camp. She said she tortured nadeen while she was in SA dance. HAHAHAHA!!!
I get in the car. And they lecture me about my language. Not my vulgarities but my singlish. They demanded that i stop "NOW". Then they continued nagging.
They really made my head hurt.
SAW MY DREADFUL ACCOUNTS TEACHER! omg of all places the supermarket! to see mrs seow! damn sad! i cant believe i saw her...my eyes are still suffering in pain from the sight haha!
came home watched gleeeee!!!! and and now watching criminal minds!! WHEEE. pure bliss.
goodnights ohio! only a few more mins to 2morrow! I Confess I Messed Up
11:18 PM
I probably shouldn't be posting now.... I need sleep but what the heck.
My brains are all mushy and I totally screwed up my entries!! After I realised my mistake....bleh... Everything just went down hill from there...
Came home was scolded. Went out, got scolded. Came back again..was called immature and childish. Was forced to wash the stack of dishes...big big big pile... In the dark! Cuz the lights were out.... Hmmmm..... I did listen the song dancing in the dark twice today.... Maybe it was a sign? Lol.... This gun is for hire and we are just dancing in the dark,.. Or it goes something like tt... Lol! Okok anyways....
Fins bf wrote bout me in his blog.... Lol it made me blush so much.... Going to kill fin soon lol.
CAKE. CAKE. CAKE. My life is like CAKE. Keith yeo. If you are reading this.... Yes... CAKE. I feel like CAKE. I think I look like CAKE. I just want to busk in my CAKE-ness lol....
Helen..... Hahahaha! Thanks for being there for me during lunch when I needed to talk to you. Hahaha thank goodness you replied.... Or I would have kept laughing to myself!! And staring at my phone screaming to it " Helen reply pls reply" I was so tempted to tell hy bout engine... Wait tts the correct Nick name right? Haha crap crap can only rmb NS. Lol.... Oh we need a new Nick name for someone.... You know who... Lol. Life is full of surprises....just stop thinking it's a trap to get you back okay! Lol.... You made it super clear...lol so don't worry! And u promised a phantom day! How can we have a phantom day when u have piano lessons! You promised you would sing and cry with me! I don't care lol.
Yeah so....Goodnights blog....good nights.... I Confess I Messed Up
11:04 PM
First of all! YAY! im finally feeling better! and!! im meeting my dramamama's this sat! cant wait! erm...orientations are this week...damn...cant be there to see my juniors...i hope they go all out! and use up whats left of their energy! LOL. errr
but hmmm...feeling really confused...
my mom was told by the doctors to becareful cause she might get skin cancer. but she tells me "ai yah...this doctor say i will get cancer that doctor say i will get cancer...i dont care already..." HAHAHAHA! i was just stunned. I dont know whether to be worried? or to be happy that she is thinking positive? Well i guess i am pretty worried, cant help it...especially when you can see her health deteriorating slowly. hmmm....
parents are telling me lots and lots of things... = confused.
my cousins were super nice to me yesterday... = confused.
My juniors are having problems but i dont know what is going on = confused
I got home walked to my bedroom switched on the light and my grandmother is sleeping on my bed = bewildered. What is she doing in my house? anyways
Having weird dreams...painful feelings, old dreams, failed ambitions, all brought back out...all a sudden...just one person can make my mind go crazy. Omg...i can feel my heart getting heavier and heavier slowly sinking...while writting this. Bleh just really confused...i hope my mind is calm for me to sleep well tonight. YAY! cant wait for work 2morrow! After im done... i will be doing excel which is a pain...but nah...at least its something different :)
HELEN TAY YI LIN! yes!!!! Its been one month! finally! Just 2 more months for me! and errr...5 more for you! hahaha! anyways I cant wait to do fyp with Leong! YAY!
and....my parents are going for their anniversary batam trip! Wheee! I will be all alone on for the weekend! and monday! awesome. hmmmm....a late night sunday? I Confess I Messed Up
11:38 PM
Soooo bored...still have 5 mins of my lunch break left so went looking at me frens manila mission work pics!!! OMG so nice!! and the kids are so cute...and the food looked so GOOD....and they tried taho! Which is the name of my cuz neighbours dog...haha! I keep imagining them eating a dog...HAHA! but yeah! mission work...hmmm...bleh i have to join the youth group... :(
anyways came across this pic!! supah nice!
back to working my ass off...hmmm...brain dead. I Confess I Messed Up
1:55 PM
Hehehe. So my lips were super dry today! So I kept Bitting of the dry skin! Till my lips bruised and bled hahaha!!! It's painful... But it looks cool. As if someone punched me hahaha!
Met nadeen today!!! Hahahaha!!! Updated myself on gossips. There is still more but nadeen says I have to wait.
Hmmmmmm..........I wonder what else is there! Can't wait! Okok errrrr...... Ate macs, made a fool of myself at macs haha!!! Azizi kept saying random Indian girl names cuz there was this nerdy Indian guy in front of us !!!! Hahaha!!! So mean!!! And they all have officially paired me up with this Indian guy from CPT? Lol dunno... But the guy gives me the creeps for a skinny indian with a floating cap on his head lol.
Ohoh another funny day of rehearsals humairah came up to me and said Sarah Sarah I have something for u! So I got all excited then she zipped open her really cute bag and took out this small pack of polyvoron cookies and cream haha! I took photos it was just such a cute sight. She said tt she went to lucky plaza and just decided to enter a Filipino shop and ask if the had it. Surprise surprise they did!!! Hehe! Yeah.... She was so excited!!! I wanted one piece haha.... She offered but I couldn't bare to take one from her... There were only like 6 pieces??? So cute!!! She told her maid to come back with more! Hehe.
I made gurinder cry today again. I am getting scared now... I hope she cried because she is happy. I told her tt she was improving sososo much! And then she cried.... I need to stop making people cry...mmmmm.... Oh anyways yeah I'm duper proud of gurinder!!! Super super proud she is doing really well in her acting!!! She is a great actress!!! :D
Erm yeah..... Ended late again..... But the juniors hmmmmmm...... They seem to be going up and down... There is no consistency in their performance. I really pray tt they really take heed of all my comments!!! And don't hate me.... But seriously.... I'm just tired of telling them, I want u to do this and I want to see this. I am tired of them chatting on the phone while in the middle of a rehearsal or singing or reading or sleeping. It's attitude tt I will not give in too. If they do it again I will send them home. There is no need for them to be at rehearsals if they feel tt they don't need to focus and that they can just walk in and out of a scene just like tt.... It's actor-ly not possible. I gave them a piece of my mind today. Cus 3 people picked up their phones while acting!!! Grrr....omg this is still so weird to me... Giving them ideas and comments and scolding them. I guess it's a good thing I was alone with them today cuz I didn't feel like wan was there to stop me from going to far lol... So I went all out haha! And July supported me so did nadeen so yay! I guess I did right things. Really happy with myself and all the ideas I came up with to help them improve. Clubcrawl.... Hmmm only 60 % but they just have to work harder. I know my juniors can do it!!!
Now I just need to sleep..... 2morrow rehearsals again.... Orientation.... I have stuff I want them to add in So till 2morrow.... I Confess I Messed Up
12:45 AM
Oh Glay...
If we can die from boredom, this is it.
HAHAHA that was an sms i received during my torturous 2-6pm safety briefing! It describes the briefing perfectly. It was held in a very COLD COLD COLD room! OMG. Horrible. So BORING! but hey i found a short cut back from the canteen, from the tour, so im happy! AND I PASSED! WHEE! Skipped the last video though. Told them i had to leave, which was true! I am so devastated that i missed the video since the videos were so INTERESTING. It was like watching blast from the past! AWESOME. Everyone in high jeans and big glasses! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! And I was POKED like 7 times by my friend! Just so i keep awake! She kept nagging at me "tidur ah" "tidur ah"...funny how she automatically knew i spoke malay. HAHA! But...bad cuz she rattles on in malay....and i soooooo dont understand...so i just nod and nod hahaha!
OHOH! Was on the train! and there was this guy in keiths pink shirt! exactly the same! hahaha! There was a white insect on the shirt!!! eewww!!
i didnt know how to tell the guy! haha! Coincidently i was texting keith about his new haircut which btw is super cute...not hahaha! Good Job keith you have officially turned yourself into a laughing-stock! But you love your hair so yeah...nvm. If you like it, then i erm *cross fingers behind back* like it too.
Oh right back to they guy! haha! yeah! keith said dont tell him anything. I didnt and soon the guy walked out of the train...away from me thank you!...with a big white bug on his shirt. Wheee. Then i just continued texting keith, helen, neela, jac and hanaffi. My fingers were exhausted by the end of the bumpy train ride!
Oh and me met nadhirahs bf today! Well he wasnt officially her bf then... but up to 40 mins ago...yes on fb...its official! hahaha! He kinda scared me though, maybe im being paranoid but he said "i like the way you speak". Hmmmmm....maybe i spoke too much and just didnt stop? Or did he really like the way i spoke? hahaha! anyways if he did really like the way i spoke then...NADHIRAH if you read this! He gets my approval! ...Not that you need it already anyway hehe.
Met firdaus and Leong!! And they both screamed my name across McDonalds -.- AGAIN. Leong went "eh my FYP partner!" and Firdaus said "Hey Sarah!" omg...so much for trying to keep a low profile! Oh and did i mention i had macs!!! 4 weeks! 4 long weeks of no macs!!! Im a very happy girl today! Ate McSpicy with Neela! Who waited for me!! YAY! If not i would have eaten alone! We were both STARVING! Both of us gobbled our food up in...hmmm...15 mins? HEHEHE. DELICIOUS! yumyum.
Rehearsals went weeeelllll.....fin kept insulting me...bitch...but i have choosen to ignore him. He did however walk me home along with azizi whom i gave, both of them, a detailed description of the cool butch in my office. HAHAHA! super cool peircings everywhere...quite erm...yeah...she left an impression hahahaha! She ate spaghetti LOL. HOME MADE. HAHAHA! I shall go ask my fren about her...hmmmm...
Yeah...told my dad tt i was being sent home by fin and azizi and he replied "oh gay"
Irritant. *looks for insecticide*. Azizi told me to reply "Oh Glay" like ok? or...like ugly. HAHA but nah didnt want to get beaten up when i got home so just sticked to OK. (notice the CAPS!) Hehe.
Yeah...going to sleep now! hahaha! SO SO happy to be coming home from school!!! Cant wait for Wednesday!! I MISS YOU SO MUCH!!! HELEN!!! AHHHH!!! Dont forget to bring my chocolates!!!! I shall bring my FMA (which you probably already have) and Baka to Test for you! and and friday at plaza sg! My week is going to be glorious!
Im back to myself...back to blogging. WOW. NICE.
CRAP. Forgot to mention! Meeting Hanaffi after work to get to school together! HAHA! Cant WAIT! I Confess I Messed Up
11:39 PM
Happy Easter!!! Wheee the Lord is Risen! Today was honestly an amazing day. I feel so happy. Met so many people. Got beaten up by my cousin. Passed nostalgic places that reminded me of good times! Woah!
So tired! Baptism in the morning. (which was so much fun, hehe kids...muahahaha!) HEAVY Lunch.
Afternoon nap or more like sleep hahaha! 3-6 O.o im just that awesome. Gossip Girl-ing for an hour. Then off to nenek's house for food and cake! A wake after. Heard stories about my grandfather. Both grandfathers. HEHE. Naughty Naughty men. Funny how my grandfathers are both share the same frens. Just got home. WAH. Good nights im off to tilam road....
Happy Death Anniversary Tata in advance.
Its been 17 years. I dont quite remember you, but something inside of me always makes me smile whenever i see your pictures. I rmb how i would always sit next to you, cuz you were always on the couch hehe. You would always tease me then treat me to ice cream Haha!
Im sorry, this year, i cant be there to celebrate your death on April 8th. Please forgive me. You will always be in my heart and the hearts of everyone. I love you. Watch over us and pray for us. I Confess I Messed Up
10:57 PM
here they are forcing me to go sleep...and when i finally sign out...they switch on this really good horror film and ask me to watch. -.-
Now they say i cant go online till i clean up my room. seriously...i dont get parents. HAHAHAHAHA!!! hilarious people. I Confess I Messed Up
1:04 AM
F*king pissed off with thing thing and SAO!!! Argh!!! how can they take my actors away!!! my actors. MINE. PISSED. I Confess I Messed Up
1:02 PM
I missed my greatgrandma's 7th day prayers today.
I already feel like shit.
But some people think that i missed it on purpose.
Why in the world would i want to do that?
Stop telling me that all my cousins were there except me.
Stop telling me that i missed all the good stuff.
I dont need it. Not now. Not when i feel like ive been stepped on 100 times.
Im sorry i was talking on the phone till 2...but i have problems. Problems that have been eating inside of me.
Problems you dont want to hear about, so i tell people who actually care about me.
Do i look like im talking nonsense? im not! i just really needed to talk to someone about my problems and insecurities! so just leave me a hell alone!!! ENOUGH!!!
Dia Mata rosak, Kepala pun rosak. Thanks. I really needed to know that.
I just want to be happy. I want to be happy for one day! Is it my fault that i cant?!
Argh...then again...these problems. I feel so stupid for having all these stupid feelings. Its all small things but i cant help it...i get really hurt.I get hurt because i am scared. I get hurt because i feel that i am not good enough. Maybe im doing something wrong. Maybe i did do something really wrong and you cant forgive me.
Honestly Ive had enough of feeling hurt. I was so tired! I was so sick! I felt so depressed, i had things to do but i continued to talk to you. I told myself, no i had to. It made me happy when i talked to you. Then you ended the convo just like that. It was as if i was some pity fuck. I didnt feel made use off. I just feel guilty for wasting your time. Hmmmmm.
Im just going to not think about it. It happens. Shit happens. Whatever it is, no matter how i feel that you are totally oblivious to everything, maybe you are not. Maybe im thinking to much into it. Its all in my head.
Maybe i have to tell you. bleh. Im so sick and tired, literally. I Confess I Messed Up
11:07 PM